Sexting Songtext
von Bo Burnham

Sexting (whoa-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
It isn′t sex, it's the next best thing
Sexting
Ayy, ayy, AT&T

I am in bed, I am ready to go with you
Tonight, I′m thinking of taking it slow
We'll use emojis only, we don't need phonetic-al diction
We′ll talk dirty like we′re ancient Egyptians

You send me a peach (oh)
I send a carrot back (ah)
You send a Ferris wheel
That's pretty abstract

I send back a ticket stub
Implying that the Ferris wheel′s your body
And I'd really love admission to it (ah)
Oh, no! What if, now, you think that I′m implying
Your vagina is as big as a Ferris wheel? (Damn)
You send back a snowman
Crisis averted (thank God)


Sexting (whoa-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
It isn't sex, it′s the next best thing
(Next best) sexting
Ayy, ayy, AT&T

No more emojis, now it's on to words
I ask, "What you're wearing?", you reply, "A shirt"
You say, "Are you naked?"
I say, "Yeah, except for a top hat"
You say, "LMAO, but I doubt that"

I′m getting hot at just the thought of what I′d do to you
'Cause in my head, I′m in your bed
And getting through to you
They made the internet for nights like these (nights like these)
I love you, baby, send a picture of your tits, please

Sexting (whoa-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
It isn't sex, it′s the next best thing
(Next best) sexting
Ayy, ayy (we are sexting), AT&T

You send the pic' and say it′s now my turn
Jesus fucking Christ, I guess I never learn
My phone's flash is my only light, and
The flash makes my dick look frightened


I chicken out and send a picture of my face instead
Because my dick looks like the baby from Eraserhead
You say, "I sent my titties, that's not fair" (that′s not fair)
So I send it to you, and then my phone dies

Another night on my own, yeah
Stuck in my home, yeah
Sitting alone
One hand on my dick and one hand on my phone, yeah

Another night on my own, yeah
Stuck in my home, yeah
Sitting alone
One hand on my dick and one hand on my phone, yeah

Another night on my own, yeah
Stuck in my home, yeah
Sitting alone
One hand on my dick and one hand on my phone, yeah

(Pussy) another night on my own, yeah
(Titties) stuck in my home, yeah
(Balls) sitting alone
One hand on my dick and one hand on my phone, yeah