The Simple Joys of Maidenhood Songtext
von Phillipa Soo

Saint Genevieve
Saint Genevieve
Where were you when my youth was sold?
Dear Genevieve
Sweet Genevieve
Shan′t I be young before I'm old?

You there!
Me?
Yes!
My name is Guenevere
I′m a princess sent from France
To marry your king
I've run away from my carriage
And if you'll whisk me out of here and to my freedom
I can pay you a royal bride′s dowry!
Well? How do you answer?

Give me a moment, Your Highness
I′m in a multilayered complication right now


It's simple!
I wish to run away

You don′t want to marry the king?

No!
I've only recently reached the age of eligibility
And woo-ability!

Oh! Do I say congratulations?

And I want to know the joys of maidenhood!
The conventional, ordinary, garden variety joys of maidenhood

Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?
Where are all those adoring, daring boys?
Where′s the knight pining so for me
He leaps to death in woe for me?
Oh, where are a maiden's simple joys?

Shan′t I have the normal life a maiden should?
Shall I never be rescued in the wood?
Shall two knights bear the tilt for me
And let their blood be spilt for me?
Oh, where are the simple joys of maidenhood?


Shall I not be on a pedestal
Worshipped and competed for?
Not be carried off, or better still
Cause a little war?
Is my fate determined by love and courtship?
No!
Clause one: Fix the border
Clause two: Establish trade
Clause three: Deliver me
Clause four: Stop the war

Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?
Are those sweet, gentle pleasures gone for good?
Shall a feud not begin for me?
Shall kith not kill their kin for me?
Oh, where are the trivial joys
Harmless, convivial joys
Where are the simple joys of maidenhood?