You Think You've Got Problems Songtext
von Christine Lavin

I′d like to tell you a story
About what it's like to be a walking hypochondriac in the 1990′s
Oh but I can't 'cause... I′m not feeling good
I think I′m coming down with something,
Something serious.
And I'd like to tell you a story
About what it′s like to be the pessimistic voice in the crowd everywhere I go
Oh but I can't ′cause... what difference whould it make?
Everything would still be as terrible as it is right now,
So why go on living?
I'd like to tell you a story
About how I′ve alienated everybody I've ever met in my whole entire life.
Nah, but I can't ′cause... ′Cuz you're so stupid
You probably don′t even know what a big word like "alineate" even means!
Life is hard
Life is rough
Life is cruel
Life is tough
Oh, like a dog stuck in a tree
I've been abandoned by humanity


And I′d like to tell you a story
About how hard it is for me to concentrate.
I'm so easily distracted everytime I try to do my work
Nahh, but I can′t tell you about that 'cause... Ooh! when did I break that nail?
Damn, I hate when that happens.
And I'd like to tell you a story
About how I can′t ever seem to make a decision these days
I′ve become so undecided about everything.
Nah but I can't cause...
Oh yes I can!
No I can′t...
Yes, I can...
No! No No No
And I'd like to tell you a story
About how it feels to be extremely PMS right now
Ah but I can′t... 'cause I DON′T FEEL LIKE IT!
Life is hard
Life is rough
Life is cruel
Life is tough
Oh, like a dog stuck in a tree
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, woe is me -