Nintendo Online’s Greatest Announcement Songtext
von Starbomb

Listen up girl, I know you a Nintendo fan
Got a Switch day one so you can hold it in your hand
Sync that wifi, know you got that speedy broadband
So you can download retro games from US and Japan

But don′t tell no one I got the secrets straight from my dad
And they'll get mad at my dad if they know he′s been bad
So listen close and remember all the news that I got

For the retro game drop
That's right for Nintendo Online's drop
We got the game Squimble 2 it′s the sequel to Squimble
Classic Mario and Zelda would just be too simple
Ronnie′s Barnyard Tussle was an all time fave
And also Shave the Cat and Adventures of Dave

Pillow Fight Simulator really raised the bar
So far you haven't experienced Banana Bazaar
Egg Maze, Gromplins, and Pachinko de Mayo
Mattel′s Barbie's Adventures in Toledo, Ohio


And maybe you were thinkin′ that these weren't the best
But just wait ′til you see the rest
I said wait 'til you see the rest
Of these games, go

Grab your SD card

Got Diarrhea Warrior, and also more of your
Favorite games like Cuck Hunt, and Mecha Lawyer
Regular Sword, and Basketbunt '89
The video game version of I Saw The Sign

We′re the luckiest gamers you′ll be happy to learn
That instead of Kirby's Adventures we got Super Plerm
That′s the Super Nintendo remake of a game called Plerm
It was a game for the classic NES called Plerm

If you're expecting greatness you′ve come to the right place
Cause instead of Galaga you've got Shooty Gun Space
Also Asteroid, no relation of course
Also Toad′s Alimony which I'll gladly endorse

Okay, to be honest there's a game I′ve been hypin′
It's a Mario game, yeah, it′s Mario Teaches Wipin'
That′s not all, bitch I haven't even gotten even started
′Cause tomorrow they're releasing Smart Fella: He Felt Smarted


And if you think that ain't enough to put your skills to the test
Wait ′til you see the rest
I said wait ′til you see the rest
Of these games go

If I wasn't clear before Super Plerm′s all we got
If classic Plerm was what you were hoping to play you sadly cannot
If you bought Nintendo Classic though you can try Plerm
But that is only a demo for a limited term

Yoshi's Tax Shelter is a game for the ages
The pages and pages of tutorial that are needed to play this
Are made of a shade of a gray that you can′t even read though
And so then Yoshi goes to prison and dies

Russian Surrender, Super Financial Lender
Dinosaurs vs. Ducks, Postal Service Defender
Also Squark, and the remake of Squark
I recommend playing Squark right before you play Squark

There's a lot of the plot that Squark just left out
So in order to understand just what Squark′s all about
I also recommend logging on to the wiki for Squark
So you can get a real deep dive on Squark

If after all these games then you just aren't impressed
Sorry there's no more left
I said sorry there′s no more left

Games go