Why Modern Radio is A-OK Songtext
von Roman Candle

I was down at my favorite watering hole
with a buddy of mine that was out on parole
and we were flipping through the jukebox,
talking how wed been and how we are.

Well hed got a library card and hed pierced his tongue
And a buddy in prison had turned him onto Neil Young
And he thought itd be best to play some for the entire bar.

Now he didnt know it but while he was in Jail
Id had my heart broke by a woman to wondrous to tell
And wed fallen in love to half the songs that jukebox played

So when he flattened his dollar on the side of the machine
and I saw comes a time come on the karaoke screen
Id realized there was a few things I had forgot to say:

Dont play Neil Young
Dont play Van Morrison
Just let some high school emo band start versing and chorusing
Because theres no way it will break my heart as far as I can see
And thats why modern radio is A OK with me.

(Over the sound of the bar noise my friend looked at me and said):


He said a pop song used to be a powerful thing,
you could turn on the am and John Lennon would sing
or Frank Sinatra would speak to all of the girls.

And you could think like a hawk or think like a dove
or think of a winter afternoon when you fell in love and
Ten songs on a record sounded like a string of pearls.

Now my buddy rattled on till an hour had passed
And I thought about shoving his head through the front door glass
And leaving him for dead, but a friend is a friend to stay.

So I listened to him talk about Johnny and June
And how true love goes from midnight to noon
I bought another round just in time to hear him say:

They dont play Sam Cooke
They dont play John Cash
They let some high school emo band play the prettiest trash
And theres no way it can break my heart as far as I can see
And thats why modern radio is a sack of monkeys to me.

He said it makes me so mad I want to get out and shout it
And I smiled and said I hadnt thought that much about it
and we walked out the street and parted ways


I mightve gone to a movie, but my money was spent
so I went on home, the Lord knows where he went
and wrote and open letter to all modern djs
(saying)

Dont play Bob Dylan
Dont play the Bends
Dont play anybody thats ever heard Sir Patrick Spens
Because broken hearted people are looking for a little something to ignore
And that is why modern radio is better than ever before
And that is why modern radio is better than ever before