Obey the Beard Songtext
von Psychostick

Mustache? No. Sideburns? No
Goatee? Maybe... beard? BEARD
Do you feel alone? Do you feel neglected
Not doin′ well with the ladies
Well I've got the solution for you

Low self esteem? GROW A BEARD
Afraid to follow your dreams
Are you lonely and sad
You wanna look good in plaid
Are you working out
Did your car break down
Ice caps melting
Are you stuck in the middle of a nowhere
And you need to make an important phone call
But the battery is dead and you can′t find an outlet
To plug in your charger

GROW A BEARD


Grow the beard. Feed the beard
Brush the beard. Manscape the beard
Stroke the beard. Love the beard
Fear the beard. OBEY THE BEARD

OBEY THE BEARD. BEHOLD THE BEARD
ACCEPT THE BEARD. RESPECT THE BEARD


Impress your date with your beard
Eat a steak
Chop down trees
Crush your enemies
Catch a fish
Round house kick
Troll the net
Chia pet? Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia beard
Drive a truck
Try your luck
Arm wrastle
Teenage Mutant Ninja Beard
Pet the doggie
I pledge allegiance to the beard
Can't grow a beard? Then BUY A BEARD
Do you have a beard? THEN GROW MORE BEARD
You need to shave this thing
SHUT UP GRANDMA, GROW A BEARD
Defend the beard, drink to the beard cause
Beards are good and scruff!
I was so empty and lost inside till I grew you (till you grew me)
I put my faith in my facial hair to get me through
Well, I can defy the odds again and again
With you on my chin (I'm on your chin)
With every moment you grow closer and closer to my heart

Do you take this beard to be your lawfully wedded beard
For bearder or for worse
In scruffiness and in beard, till shave do you part? I beard

Abe Lincoln had a beard. ZZ Top, EPIC beards
Dimebag Darrell, METAL beard
Chuck Norris, KICKASS beard
Number One Make it beard. Chewbacca IS a beard
Santa Claus, Jesus Christ
GOD has a beard