Product Team Offsite Songtext
von Gavin Castleton

Ya′ll product meetings suck!
You hacks leave me baffled
So slack jawed I wanna smack ya'll with a laptop!
I′m up on Tumblr while you corporate clowns bungle up priorities
Preach on market fit without authority


"Your spreadsheet is boring, B"
Keep that junior dev team quarantined!
Feed em sprint points rather than a proper raise
Kind of funny CS dummies go to code camp but can't get Agile for the wage blaze

We can settle this like men in the ping pong den
Yeah, yeah "ping" for serve—we both know how it's gonna end
Me: not a single sleeve rolled up... and you?
Disheveled, unkept, soaking through your Trunk Club

Go ahead and drop that topspin trash, B!
They call me "Backboard" because nothing gets passed me
Now hobble back to your ergonomic ivory tower and let me jump on
Slack to let the team know that you′re still wack, coward