Homemade Radio Spot Songtext
von Frank Zappa / The Mothers

Hit it!

Hi
This is for the sales personnel at Warner Reprise!
Hey! How are you guys? How was the lunch? Not collapsed?

Hey! (Eddie, are you kidding?)
Ladies and gentlemen
I′d like to introduce you to Eddie, the new, symbolic Warner Brothers star salesman
And here he is

Thank you
Thank you very much
Hi, I'm Eddie
And I can really relate to you guys out there
Because just like you, I′ve worked my way up through the ranks to get to sell Warner Reprise products
Right here, yes!
I started out selling suits out there to the man in the street
And who is better equipped than me to sell records to the man out there on the street?
Working my way up through the ranks, just like you did here at Warner Reprise! Hey!


Now I'll let you in on a little secret
This may help you a lot merchandising this fantastic new product we've got
The Mothers, live, Fillmore East, June 1971
You′re actually going to listen to the real sound of my voice on the telephone
Talking to distributors all around the country
Maybe you can get some ideas (and here′s how you do it)

Ring, ring! Ring, ring!
Hello, Trans-Flighted distributors
Yeah, yeah
This is Eddie, I'm calling for Frankie
No, not that Frankie
Burbank, from Warner Brothers
Yeah, how′s the record doing?
No, not Chungus Revenge
No, not Strangers in the...

No, yeah, the white one with the pencil (the pencil front) the pencil front
Yeah, the film next to Ratners, but down from the garment
Yeah, how's it... Yeah? Oh, fantastic
House... House Fellas? Oh, Little Emil? Oh, great
Kiss him for me, huh?
You get that champagne and censor for increasing hype?
Yeah, you′re going to give me a few of these albums for me?
Thanks a lot. See ya


Ring, ring! Ring, ring!
Hello, Piedmont distributors
Yeah, how's the record doing down there in South America?
Yeah, this is Eddie
I′m calling for Frankie
No, not that Frankie
No, not Hot Meat, not Weasels, not Chungus

Yeah, the white one with the pencil front, the pencil front
Yeah, the next to Ratners
How's the room? Oh, that's fine
Kiss the kids for me, will ya? Say hello to your mother