Arena Songtext
von Five Year Mission

One day while investigating Cestus III
An alien superpower kidnapped me
And put me face to face with a dangerous enemy

How the hell did I get myself into this mess?
They say we have to fight to the death
So I defend my life with every breath

If Bones were in my shoes, he′d know what to do
He'd probably hit him with a hypospray or two
And then tell him jokes until he was subdued

Mr. Spock could take him out with one nerve pinch
Or mind-meld him into thinking that he′s our friend
Either way, with Vulcan logic, you know that it would be a cinch

Well, I put both hands together and swing like I'm holding bat
And then I duck when he swings at me, karate chop him in the back
I don't know how I′ll win, but I′ll tell you what I'll do
For the greater good of the Federation
In the name of the Enterprise crew


I′m gonna kick his ass, kick his ass
I'm gonna kick his ass, kick his ass
I′m gonna kick his ass, kick his ass
I'm gonna kick his ass, kick his ass

If only Mr. Sulu were standing here
He′d samurai-slice him without any fear
And where is Charlie Evans when you need someone to disappear?

With a sultry look, Uhura would lure him in
To a place where he'd have no room to defend
Then he'd get a beat-down by Nurse Chapel and Janice Rand

Well, I pick up a rock and I throw it at his chest
And it bounces off like Styrofoam, he throws a boulder at my head
I′ll figure out how to win ′cause that's all I know how to do
For the greater good of the Federation
In the name of the Enterprise crew

I′m gonna kick his ass, kick his ass
I need to kick his ass, kick his ass
I have to kick his ass, kick his ass
I wanna kick his ass, kick his ass

Scotty would challenge him to a duel
Where scotch and brandy were fighting tools
Or maybe he'd just beam him inside of some solid rock


Well, I put my mind to it, and I figured the weapon out
And just in the nick of time, I became the victor in this bout
You knew that I would win because I always do
I′m James Tiberius Kirk, captain of the Enterprise crew

And I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
Well, I just kicked his ass, kicked his ass
(No thanks to the Metrons!)
I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
Girl, you know I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
(Woo!)

I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
I kicked his ass, kicked his ass
(Arena!)